The Diary of a Nobody
Being the modern day record of Charles
Pooter VI -
direct descendant of the 19th Century original
Monday, November 02, 2009
Lupin went to the office with me, and had a long chat with Barry Perkupp. The upshot was he’s now an Account Assistant at Cleanands International Investment Brokers. Lupin told me it was a ramshackle bunch of hedge fund operators, but I said “beggars can’t be choosers” and he had the decency to look a little ashamed of himself.In the evening we went to the Cummings’ for a few fireworks. It drizzled, and I thought it was pretty boring. One of the roman candles fizzled out before it went off properly, and Gowing said “Pick it up and whack it on your boot and it’ll start up OK”. Which I did. The whole thing went up with a sudden bang and I burnt my fingers. I gave the rest of the candles to Cummings’ little son to let off.
Later I got a load of stick when Cummings hammered a huge catherine wheel onto a stake in the ground for the grand finale. Cummings was banging on about how fantastic it was and how much it had cost – twelve quid. Needless to say, it was hard to light, and when we eventually managed to get it working, it went round twice (slowly) and stopped. Great. I’d got a stick, so I gave it a tap to get it going properly. Wouldn’t you know it, it fell off the stake into the grass. Bloody hell. You’d have thought I’d set the house on fire, the way everyone went on at me. Forget fireworks parties. They’re a complete waste of time and money.
©MMIX KONSIGNIA. All rights reserved.
Why shouldn’t
I publish
my diary?
I often see memoirs by people I’ve never even heard of and I don’t see why my diary should be any less interesting, just because I’m not a ‘celebrity’. I only wish I’d started it when I was younger.
Charles Pooter
The Laurels, 32 Elmside,
Barleycorn Mead, Harrow on the Hill.
charles@charlespooter.com
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