The Diary of a Nobody
Being the modern day record of Charles
Pooter VI -
direct descendant of the 19th Century original
Sunday, August 02, 2009
We’ve not seen Willie since Christmas, and he’s really grown. Looks like a young man. It’s hard to believe he’s Carrie’s son – he looks more like her brother. I don’t like him slobbing around the house in cut-offs, flip-flops and a T-shirt (this isn’t Newquay), but I didn’t comment on it because he said he was tired after the journey. We had a bottle of Jacob’s Creek at dinner to celebrate his visit.He said “Hey, I’ve cut my first name, William, and opted for my middle one,“Lupin”, instead. Up in Oldham, I’m only known as “Lupin Pooter”. If you asked for “Willie” up there, they wouldn’t know who you were talking about”.
Since Lupin was an old family name, Carrie was delighted and she started reeling off a big long saga relating to the Lupins. I interrupted and said I thought William was a nice simple name. I reminded Willie that it was what his uncle had been called, and his uncle had been very well respected in the banking business. Willie said “Yeah yeah. Whatever. “Good old Bill”” and helped himself to a third glass of wine.
I said “Willie, I hope everything’s going well at the bank?" He replied “It’s Lupin. Got it? Lupin. Oh yeah, and the bank: the staff are morons and the manager’s mental”. I was so shocked I couldn’t say a word. Clearly, there’s something up.
©MMIX KONSIGNIA. All rights reserved.
Why shouldn’t
I publish
my diary?
I often see memoirs by people I’ve never even heard of and I don’t see why my diary should be any less interesting, just because I’m not a ‘celebrity’. I only wish I’d started it when I was younger.
Charles Pooter
The Laurels, 32 Elmside,
Barleycorn Mead, Harrow on the Hill.
charles@charlespooter.com
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